The season has begun. The sun shone bright and this small corner of Ham, nestling alongside the Thames became our battleground. For a municipal pitch it was actually rather attractive, lined as it was on all sides by trees, horses and the entrance gate to Ham House. Even the outfield threatened little risk of a broken ankle, wicket was also reasonable though dull.
BAFTA CC needed supplementing by SCC members so we brought about fifteen along and were able to get a match on, which was after all the whole point of the season, cricket! Pitch was laid out and the PAWS were soon sat in expectant excitement.
SCC fielded first and due to commencement running late, there was already a feeling of time pressure. Myself and New comrade Tomsk (Tom Mayhew) opened the bowling and tried to keep things calm. Very quickly it became clear that S.Tommy (?) was a good bat and was finding sixes and fours from the first seven overs. Bennettov was donated to BAFTA and opened alongside Tommy (really? Is that his name?) He was only just back from foreign travels and I think the foreign food may have influenced his performance. Good for us though and I hope he forgives me for keeping his score under check with tootsie bowling.
Comrade Chipmonkski Nibbed in ( Brother Tim Richardson). Tomsk moved back into the field having fought valiantly against Tommy and Bennetov over three overs for 22 runs. Chipmonkski had a fight but by now both bats had some eye in. The run rate stepped up and the mood drooped. Chipmonkski was joined in the battle with Soldya (Dan March) but Tommy was clattering briskly by now. Two slow medium pacers were too tempting and the traps set for a catch were never quite tight enough. The odd dropped catch… Ahh.
With Tommy passed 50 Samovar (Sam Kankamage) was called up. Bennettov adopted the impartiality of the BAFTA loan with fine aplomb and scored a lovely 25 before being caught delightfully by Jonty at mid wicket! The atmosphere was lifted. Our very own comrade captain commissar captain Marx popped up, again on loan to BAFTA. Sixteen scored not out.
BAFTA team 3 May 2013 v SCC
The last few overs were quite tough to watch from the outfield but were blessed by fighting spirit and two great moments. Tomsk, who had been passing me every over as we travelled in and out, was brilliantly rushing in from the deep and pouched a lovely catch taking the wicket of Tommy for 104. A great score by him and a great catch by Tomsk. There were also two run outs the best being on the very last ball of the innings, seeing Robski clatter the stumps after a furious scrabble. Brilliant!
Brandonovski and Yuri Bromance
Even by the length of this report so far you can see that time had slipped by and the sun was beautiful, golden… And just about sunk below the west! We should have reduced overs? Who knows but it was so dark! Samovar and Tomsk were in first and both out very soon from sharp bowling by Miller. This bought Robski and myself in. Spotting a dark red ball against the sun at dusk against silhouetted trees is obviously not a great laugh and bouncers and medium fast bowling doesn’t help. But after Robski departed, Brandonovski and myself settled nervously down to a little Dorothy and a little hitting out. Two career bests followed ( career!!! lol) and saw Bennettov put up 20 and myself 12. We shall both be smiling for weeks.
Vladimir Boringski (Charlie Richards) and comrade commissar Treasurer Ilyeva produced scores of 18 and 8 respectively and if I am not wrong, that may have been Ilyeva’s best too. Quiet and solid. Well done both.
Scoreboard SCC v BAFTA 3may2013
So BAFTA CC/SCC win 154 runs over 90 and congrats and good luck with the team and year ahead. Special mention to S.Tommy whose 104 was blinding and well deserved. Thanks To Ross too for being bold enough to start a BAFTA team and we hope to meet again on the field.
For me, comrade of the match?…. I think I shall nod to Brandonovski who projected his batting forward brightly into this new season. All the nets have made an enormous difference on the weaker part of last year’s games, the batting. Let’s keep it up comrades and have a great season. Semper Sodales, fors et victores!
Do Svidaniya
As ever, to amend any details in this report you have 30 days to do it! Let me know as I am only human. Thank you.
Last night we had an excellent net session. I was delighted to see a new face, Tom Mayhew – long time friend and sporting comrade to our very fine Cobramovich. Also joining us was VCC (and SCC occasional) – most welcome Rob Muller. Both he and Tom will be needing a CCCP nickname so comrades, get thinking. At the nets too was recent acquisition, John Hirst (nick name please!), Robski, Danny “Hillerenka”, Brandonovski, Altmananov and myself, Yuri.
Comrade Muller proved a happy addition to the night as he was able to bring in his more extensive knowledge of the game and bring out the best of some our fine comrades. Thank you, Rob. SCC’s Robski was lucky to get some batting tips and we all agree that his style and dare i say, communist elegance is sweeping to the fore. Those long limbed swipes of the willow seemed ineffably easy and elegant.
New comrade Mayhew (man of sound excellence!) proved a very useful addition. A fast pair of arms and wrists was putting away nearly all deliveries. Luckily he also posesses some quick reactions and could drop quickly from an over of bouncers I pitched up. His bowling too was good and tight and we look forward to seeing him with us on Friday.
Comrade Hirst, good to his word and eager to attend was pitching some fantastic full length deliveries which seemed to slip through like a soldering iron through tissue. I only got to put a few down to him whilst batting but already I see our batting strength increasing for this season.
Altmananov, stoical, solid, bright eyed and fast to spot the ball was working on some find Dorothy action, dotting the ball solidly and we shall be requiring plenty of that as the season develops. Those pesky late order slips need halting and Altmananov will supply. Bloody good with arm I feel and mid/close fielding will be in order!
It is hard to summaries the beauty of Hillerenka behind the stumps. A more affable and sprightly pair of hands are only made less important by the terrific sledging ability this comrade is capable of. No oppo could fail to admire the terrific verbal banter which sets them off ease and their bales on the grass. But comrades, a true wicky and slip ability and I know that Robski will be keeping his eyes open and learning. With comrade commissar captain Marx, Hillerenka and Robski, I feel we have a great little wicky and slip team. Bravo comrades.
To Brandonovski who I noticed was full of Vim and Vigor last night. Encore! The bat was machete’ing through the wayward balls. I was desperate to “Dorothy” him but rarely had the chance and all we could sledge was an umpiring shout down which barely did us justice. The side-arm is a lethal weapon in Brandonovski’s hands and has really provided some excellent batting opportunities. Personally comrade, More. I want more. I want that ball zipping passed my feet. Let’s aim for an 80mph delivery!!!
As for me, much happier with my beloved Matrix bat. Even down the offside I feel and inkling towards a drive but I must get my head over more and stop pitching it up for a catch. Bowling, well i feel that right arm round and slip/wicky nick is my bowl for the season!
So to this Friday and our game : http://www.sohocricketcollective.com/?event=scc-versus-bafa-cc-2020-friday-may-3rd The season truly begins. Comrades – it will be fun and a gentle start to the season. The spirit of this event is just right as we are going to be helping BAFTA out with numbers and we are all keen to get our eyes in. Let’s have fun and play dricket.
Comrades! I stand before you, whilst being sat at my computer, astonished by last week’s turnout at the nets. And the weather, comrades in willow, was far from seasonal. The cold wind that snapped up about our Urals was as bitter as the draft from an Eskimo’s freezer door. More frigid and damp air could not be found in a nun’s pond. I promise there shall be no more similes Which is a believable as squirrel with three nuts. But it was COLD!
We had an amazing turnout: Ilyeva, Brandonovski, Soldya, Altmananov, Boringski, Samovar and myself, Yuri. Two nets, the side-arm and a suitable amount of kit to keep the frequency of batting practice up. Ilyeva has taken quite a shine to this weapon of bowling and after an hour was getting the ball down the end of the wicket at an alarming pace and thankfully, accurate too. This little device has truly helped us to build on our batting skills.
We were deploying the three hits and swap method so there were nearly always 3 or 4 bats padded up and swapping out after a run of three balls. It works well and also provides a bit of running. Keeps the eyes hungry too as you never get long enough to just smack the balls away. I was lucky enough to return to my first bat which I didn’t use all last year for fear of its weight and grandeur. Fool was I, for this nets it came upon me as an epiphany and I shall hence forth use her wisely!
More nets this week of course and if we get the same turn-out I shall be amazed. But without doubt the turnout was fantastic and I have included a photograph of the usual suspects below. We cannot stress enough, comrades; The nets are completely open. If you ever played and are embarrassed to come back or if you never played and think you will know nobody there – it does not matter. We are all comrades together and it would be lovely to see you all at the nets. Please make it along as it will really help our game and your selection!
Welcome amongst us our newest comrade – We shall call him comrade Altmananov (pronounced: Alt-Man-Annov). He has of course another name, John Altman but this lingers from his previous imperialist days which he has now shed to find shelter amongst our fine body of red adorned cricketeers!
He was with us last week as we fought off the biting cold to improve our batting averages. Joined by Brandonovski, Robski, Ilyeva and myself we made a fine five and hurtled our batting averages upwards. Altmananov has a good eye, in fact, two. Like the rest of us, work required on stroke play but we see fine potential amongst his batting. Famed of course for his nasty Nick reputation, it is with utmost respect that i may say, comrades, a more suitably pleasant and mild mannered addition he makes to our collective.
Comrades, I thought you would like to learn a little of the backstage drama that happens whilst some of us come together to build the excellence of the team! I know you can’t all make it along to these events, but do try, comrades, do try. You will find yourselves being picked more readily for a team, nobody likes a shirker!
Cobra at Winter Nets
February Nets
Oh yes we did. Last Tuesday 19th Feb, Brandonovski, Cobramovich and myself Yuri, went along to the illuminated nets at Paddington Rec. The lights took a while to come on to be honest, but when they were, they looked great and the nets shone! We were wearing thermals, 20-20 kit, jumpers and thick socks. But to be honest, after a damn good bat and some bowling, our heads were steaming hot.
The hot addition for the night was Brandonovski’s inspired acquisition of the Side Arm. This insures that no matter who is bowling, the ball will get down the net and be playable by the bats person who is practising. Of course, if we are bowling practising then that is a different matter. But tonight we wanted to really improve our bat for the new season. I got my lid on first and faced up to some of Brandonovski’s chucking and boy, it’s fast! Accurate too, and I was facing 90% playable balls. My focus was to Pull shots down the leg side and after a few overs, I was improved. I used to step backwards endlessly just to defend them… duh!
Brandonovski was working on his off side drive although I also think he is looking to up his tally of dots for 2013. But some very nice action and good shapes! But I feel some swinging may add to an excellent quiver of strokes – next nets, comrade. It was good to see that his shoulder was much improved after a recent off spell, tenderly fixed by comrade Samovar.
Cobramovich was stoical in his determination to improve his soft wristed spill to the leg side, giving fine leg a tremendous sprint or the wicky some fractured ribs. He always looks good in his action and most of our comments were to congratulate him on subpplety of wrist. A lesson for us all, comrades. But I wanted him out from and edge and my bowling focused on coming around and across. I know there shall be no LBW from such rash bowling but I want a slip catch or two this season.
Cobramovich was lowering his action in delivery for the height of the nets but Brandonovski and I both felt this gave his balls more speed and improved accuracy to. Could this be a development for the season? We shall see. Whatever, we were all delighted with the nets and will be booking more winter nets very very soon! Come along.
Umpiring Course Week 5
Norman in full flight
It is hard to specify exactly how cold these Thursday nights at Lord’s have been. The weather has been utterly shocking, howling wind and snow, and freezing chill factors, Batman! The course is good. We are learning, comrade commissar Brandonovski and myself, all about the art and shall we say approach to umpiring required for us to hopefully get our Level 1 qualification from the ACO. We have one more regular week, then a mock exam week and the final week, the exam!
So what does that mean for you comrades? It doesn’t mean you don’t have to worry about umpiring at a match in the future. Nope. In fact, the reverse. We need a good core of umpire happy comrades to take part during all matches. Brandonovski and I will go out with those amongst us with years of cricket umpire helping behind them. So we shall learn their feeling and interpretation. We shall impart our more recent knowledge and other comrades will come in and help and learn. This way, our knowledge can be dissipated through the team and we shall all be happier to go out and ump’. Maybe next year, we can get one or two more comrades to do the course – we do subsidise it from membership!
Well thank you comrades for reading up and what’s going down. GET TO THE NETS as the season is starting very soon and you will all be hopelessly out of shape and none of you will have your eyes in. If we see you at the nets, we shall see you on the pitch – it’s that straight forward!
Myself and our Glorious Premier have signed-up to take an ECB umpiring course. Both of us felt we were lacking some knowledge and that having two ‘qualified’ umps within the SCC ranks would only be a good thing.
PLEASE NOTE – This does not mean we’re going to stand for every ball of every game, so the rest of you still aren’t off the hook! [Ed: Not by a long fuqin hook!]
Here follows a small précis of events from the first couple of weeks, stay tuned for further updates as the course progresses – same (cricket) bat time, same (cricket) bat channel.
Lord’s claim to being the Home of Cricket is not up for debate, sadly its position as the Home of an Effective Central Heating System is less secure. It would take a better scribe than me to explain to you, dear reader, just how cold our classroom was, suffice to say that Old Father Time looked positively cosy on his perch atop the Mound Stand compared to our shivering group of prospective Bowdens.
Our group, a motley crew of 15 assorted cricket bores, sat attentively while Norman, the font of all things umpire, explained what we had let ourselves in for. Six weeks of instruction, each described as a ‘delivery’ ( see what they did there?), then a mock exam with a final exam taking place on the final night.
Assuming we pass, our CVs will feature the ECB ACO Level 1 qualification, the bottom rung of a ladder that could elevate your comrades to the dizzy heights of Level 5 followed by an invitation by the ICC to join their Elite Panel of umpires who stand at test matches (it’d save me fortune in tickets if nothing else).
Thus far we’ve covered such topics as ‘what to do if a dog runs off with the ball’ – the answer is the ball is dead (so would be the dog if it got in the way of one of Sam’s quicker deliveries) and the ‘correct time for conducting the toss’ – the answer is not as I guessed ‘whenever you can drag the captains out of the warm pavilion’, but a very precise time window of ‘not earlier than 30 minutes, nor later than 15 minutes before the scheduled or any rescheduled time for the match to start’. Scintillating stuff, I’m sure you’ll agree!
The meeting commenced around a round table that catered for all of the suitable paperwork and provided ample space for food and wine to be laid out. This, comrades, was achieved successfully and was suitably ample.
Welcome and note
As comrade commissar premier, Yuri P greeted all those present. The quorum was achieved and meeting commenced at 19:30
Financial Statements
Comrade commissar Treasurer, Ilyeva provided us with the statement of account, To-whit:
The Revenue was:
In the 2012 season of play there 15 players who paid the subscriptions and one of which was a junior player. This came to a total of £540.00.
Matches and Net fees produced £361.00
The costs were as follows:
Internet fees, including hosting and transfer of domain, £105.50
Ryde BBQ fee for team £100.00
Trophy cost £58.50
Match teas £385.00 TOTAL COSTS £649.00
As of 22nd January 2013:
The bank held £910.65
Cash held £89.98
Charitable donations made:
Royal Marsden and D.Adam’s appeal £1,400.00
Charitable donation to be made:
Parkinson’s UK £360.16
The latter donation shall be made next week and we shall publicise it.
Membership fees will remain unchanged at £40.00 with half of that going to our charities.
Ilyeva concluded.
Quartermasters Report
Comrade commissar Quartermaster, Brandonovski provided us with the statement of account, To-whit:
Serious Cricket have provided us with a very good service this season and many comrades have taken up the colours for us. The scheme that they provide gives us a small kick back for all kit bought and over the course of the season we are due just over £60.00 to go to the bank.
We have decided that all paid up members MUST have at least an SCC shirt.
The treasurer must purchase and the quartermaster must present or make able to be borrowed two XL SCC shirts for every match. This way we can maintain a good image on the pitch and provide spares for those who forget or those who play unusually for us!!!
Jumpers to be ordered Before the end of February. ILYEVA is to proceed with ordering.
Blazers would be a welcome addition and some research should commence throughout the season by the quartermaster into a good source and design.
Cultural attaché’s Report
Comrade commissar Quartermaster, Brandonovski provided us with the statement of account, To-whit:
Comradery in the field and increased skills will be achieved by improving our knowledge of field positions. This will speed up positioning and produce and over all feeling of well being amongst a confident and suitably located player.
Again, a binding and culturally significant level of knowledge will be in us all in understanding Umpiring signals. This will benefit scoring and bring us together as a tight, cohesive unit.
More fanaticism is required. Let’s build the brand and drive more zealotism into our comrades. Fashion items should be designed and made available. Reference to http://www.bodylinetshirts.com
Cobramovich accepted continued nomination as cultural attaché and wants to work with Brandonovski in developing a training schedule as a joint responsibility.
Cobramovich concluded.
Captains’ Reports
Comrade commissar Captains provided us with the statement of account, To-whit:
Captain Marx-B is very keen for us to improve our decision making in the field as umpires. There were some shocking decisions made last and particularly in regards to our own team players. Hopefully this will improve this year as Brandonovski and Yuri are doing their level 1 umpiring course and will spread knowledge. Also, we should use square leg umpire as an opportunity to train lesser experienced officials through observation of the other.
Captain Cobramovich wants to see “stick ability” and all were suitably antagonised by my comment that I may as well swing out and go out for two as opposed to stick in and go out for two. His point being that our will improve greatly from time in the square scoring not much than a brief walk in and out and scoring not much. Fair point.
Equally, he noted with suitable admiration the captain of Stonor CC comment he “doesn’t care for pavilion pressure”. The underlying truth is that batting trading and heads down to follow the ball will strikingly improve our scores.
Also, more team building chat is required in the field. Perhaps some chanting, singing and glue type vocalisation.
Captain Yuri is up for more captaining and by the end of the season would like to captain a full day match.
Comrade Jontin was nominated and accepted to be a field captain for at least a match in the season and was warmly greeted into the commissariat thereby making him comrade commissar captain Jontin.
Commissariat positions
Comrade commissar Premier, Yuri provided us with the statement of positions, To-whit:
No comments were submitted to change the nature of the commissar roles, so no change in name or number shall be made. So the 2013 commissar roles are accordingly:
Comrade commissar Premier, Yuri
Comrade commissar Treasurer, Ilyeva
Comrade commissar cultural attaché, Cobramovich
Comrade commissar quartermaster, Brandonovski
Comrade commissar captains, Marx-B, Cobramovich, Jontin, Yuri
Comrade commissar adjutants, Soldya, Antonov. NB the latter TBC by Antonov.
Commissars, Cobramovich and Brandonovski have been voted for to jointly look after the training rosta for the SCC this season. Cobramovich securing all boot camp and field activities and Brandonovski supervising all net bookings. Details to follow very soon.
Nobody desired a vote to change the holder of premier or treasurer positions in the 2014 AGM and so none shall be offered. However, a vote can be held in 2014 AGM to make the same decision for 2015.
Fixtures
Comrade commissar Premier, Yuri provided us with the statement of fixtures, To-whit:
All of the fixtures were agreed as was also the desire to find an April match. All fixtures are available on the blog.
Sponsorship
Comrade commissar Premier, Ilyeva provided us with the statement of need, To-whit:
It was thought that the SCC may not yet need sponsorship. When we have more members then perhaps we shall have a need.
What would any sponsorship be needed for? Not items or kit necessarily it perhaps some exuberant fixtures? We talked of creating a match in Red Square in Moscow fuss a local team and comrade commissar Jontin was going to investigate such a fixture. Smirnoff could sponsor such an event under the line “worth a shot!”
Pre-season drinks
Comrade commissar Premier, Cobramovich provided us with the statement of thirst, To-whit:
Cobramovich vigorously nominated his home for a preseason drinks event TBC.
Any other business
Comrade commissar Premier, Yuri provided us with the statement of rules, To-whit:
Founder members are those players who played in the season 2010/2011 seasons however they are provided with no special acclaim in selection anymore.
Selection will work hence:
First choice will go to fully paid up members of the SCC up until 23:59 three days before the match. So for a Sunday match, Wednesday 23:59.
Second choice is all non members and guests.
If an over subscriotion occurs by accident or otherwise, the captain of the match will decide the players to take part on the field.
18th December 2012:
Sorry, the mysteries are not revealed. I just thought I would write that to get your attention. However, there were some cricketing mysteries explored further. Stance, movement, I think we all came away with a few new pointers. Our superb Scottish instructor was hurling balls at us at great pace and watching our ever improving flailing. The evening was brilliantly fixed up by Brandonovski who showed brave heart and was soon facing the flinging scot!
The benefit of these sessions is astonishing. Typically one comment will stay with you. One simple thing. A bit like somebody pointing out that you will walk more evenly if you put both shoes on and not just the one. Yet stupidly, all these years, you have only warn the one of them! Then suddenly, “Yes, Yes I can walk better! I cannot believe I have been doing it so stupidly!” – You have to substitute walking for batting there, just in case Christmas has left you utterly dense.
Get this, Brandonovski!
My numpty reforming message was “Get that front foot into the line of the ball and hit it. No, not the foot.” This then led to a spritely series of overs where I clobbered nearly every one. Astonishing. So astonishing, Soldya whispered to the Scot and then i had a few overs of 85mph balls. Actually hit some, so feeling rather smug – Rahhhh! Bloody hell though, you cannot see those things much. You have to make an educated guess on where it may have been heading and don’t try and whack every one, just get in its way.
It was a fabulous event and despite all of us suffering from aches and an expensive curry and beers afterwards, it was well worth it. Thank you Brandonovski – a great piece of organizing.
Wednesday, 23rd January 2013 – SCC AGM The Union Club
50 Greek Street
London
W1D 4EQ
This splendid event comes but once a year, and boy, that’s enough. You verily love to attend and last year our numbers in attendance were simply average. I thank you for that. It is like some deathly chore that I realise you all feel the fear of. Like a trip to a Dentist or some form of sexual health clinic. But i promise you there shall be no drills, swabs, gas or purple liquid – nor anything from a Dentist’s either.
I want you to report back to me if you have any additions to the items on the agenda below. However, I must have feedback one week before the meeting in order to incorporate it and discuss it.
Those who captain the team or are expected to captain the team in the season will automatically adopt the commissar epithet.
If I hear of no difference in opinion before the week deadline before the AGM, these are the roles that will come into existence for the 2013 season.
Nominations can be from oneself or from a third party with the agreement of that nominated, and must be submitted for the agreed roles of commissar as will be publicised a week before the AGM.
Those at the AGM will vote on the those nominated and the successful nominee be allocated the role he/she was nominated for immediately and for the whole of the 2013 season.
At this time, the roles of commissar Premier and commissar Treasurer cannot be nominated for and rest with Yuri and Ilyeva, as at present. HOWEVER at the AGM a vote shall be held on whether these roles can be voted for at the January 2014 AGM.
We have indeed drawn a firm black line under the season’s official events. There may be a net before the year closes but no more games and no further socials either. But what joy was gleaned from Prosecco, good company, awards and merit and the great comradery of the SCC for our end of season drinkums.
Pogo Films sponsored the event with help from The Union Club providing us space to celebrate and cheer! All other contributions were from you yourselves, the finest cricketing comrades to ever walk the streets of Soho. Our home ground may well be the distant pastures of Suffolk or the closer, wild-life and midge infested plains of Regent’s Park, but our stomping grounds of celebration are firmly set in Soho and long may it last.
A turn out of more than a team with Umpires and scorers too, so a great success. Faces in the crowd too many to mention or remember but some new faces and those rarely seen; Looking forward to seeing more of Hudski (Menhaj Huda) next year and some more fixtures with Nickolai Nastarov (John Altman)
“But what about the prizes?” I hear none of you whimper. Here then are the results:
Most Runs Scored throughout 2012: SAMOVAR (Sam Kankanamge)
Most Wickets taken by bowling 2012: SOLDYA GRANMA FORRAFIVER (Dan March)
Most catches by a fielder 2012: SOLDYA GRANMA FORRAFIVER (Dan March)
Most catches by a Wicket Keeper 2012: ROBSKI (Rob Dixon)
Most Improved comrade 2012: SEWELLSKI (Andrew Sewell)
Captaincy Merit awards: COBRAMOVICH, MARX-B, YURI (Tim Graham, Mark Blacklegde, Philip Richardson)
And finally, The Soho Cricket Collective’s Comrades’ Comrade Samovar Trophy went to COBRAMOVICH (Tim Graham)
This latter award was richly deserved by Cobramovich, who despite ties in many quarters holds the finest of Collectivist qualities, provided great guidance on the field and is also our most splendid comrade commissar of Cultural Affairs. It was close, may I add, one point each separated the top comrades. But there can be no doubt in Cobramovich’s worthiness and delight in receiving this splendid, if somewhat bloody heavy, award! Hurrah, comrade commissar!
From my humble self, the comrade commissar premier of the SCC to all comrades, to all those who played for and supported us and to all those with whom we battled, my most heart felt of thank you’s and may we all meet, play and celebrate again in the next season – SCC 2013!
