Stonor CC win by 7 wickets scoring 219
SCC all out for 95
Timed match

Comrades, it is almost unbelievable that our last match of the season has been played. I am so upset, I haven’t yet even opened my kit bag to clean my whites. However, Mrs. Yuri will no doubt soon be bend my ear to do so. Still, as the season has to end, it could not have ended with a more beautiful, exciting and friendly fixture as this. Stonor CC came as manner from a communist heaven (Minsk?) to replace the dissolved fixture with the NFTS. It will be back next year, but so will Stonor, I hope! Thanks to The Fixture List for tipping me the nod,  cocking me a wink or wibbling me wobble.

THEIR KNOCK
Strolling out into the Valley of the living, gazed down on by Red Kites and Dear from the valley’s soft, encompassing hills, one was filled with a desire to play smashing cricket and be jolly hearted and hopeful. Cobramovich captained and won the toss and put the oppo into bat, we were off.

Collings and Powell strolled purposefully out into their field of battle, the SCC gathering themselves to play. The sun was bright and hot and the bowling opened with myself and Antonov. I had bowled two balls to dot, then on my third, Collings made a playful swoosh and edged the ball high and into the grateful and sticky hands of our comrade, Andropov Sewelski. An amazing start. I felt quite bad, being so familiar to the batsman’s situation myself, but Andropov and I will bathe in the wicket, thank you very much!

Replacing Collings was Left hander, Nicholson. Reviewing the scorecard I realise that I almost had exclusive use of Nicholson with few other bowlers getting a go at him. Although he had much more use of me than him. Antonov held down Powell quite well on the other side but it took until an unfortunate 49 for Antonov to get a snick and provide Robski with a great double catch at the wicket. A very valuable bat to take.

Antonov had 6 overs for 32 runs and a wicket, nice and economic compared to my 8 for 48 and 1. Much improved results from Antonov mark well for next season whereas my plans for round-the-wicket slip catching may go back on hold. KanKan and Chipmonkski were soon bowling. The former once again coming in like a Steam Roller and the Chipmonkski with his punishing demi-loft, lengthy nibble-off-the bails bowl. Though neither Nicholson or Mayo fell, KanKan had 24 off 6 overs and Chipmonkski, 31 from his first 4 over spell.

Jontin now presented his sterling, communist self at the crease and on his second over, suckered the unsuspecting, though already comfortable at 64 Powell into pitching the ball hard and high on the offside towards the pavilion. What followed, comrades, was a cross between a balletic pirouette and side step, an elegant presentation of both arms above the head and a scooping up of the ball in both hands by Vladimir Boringski (aka Charlie). He took a tumble but came up ball in hand. Beautiful.

Mayo retired hurt at 50 leaving Hunt and young S.Kimber to face Deanov and Chipmonkski on a second spell. Hunt achieved 30 and the young blood, 2 – but his first proper runs we are told, so collective hats off to him, comrades! Deanov’s 4 overs cost 28 and Jontin’s 6 for 45 and 1 wicket, don’t forget. Chipmonkski’s second spell of 2 overs for 2.

OUR KNOCK
I find fielding first not to my liking, comrades. I was quite bushed and the thought of settling down to the scorecard and dotting up our batting was a relief. Something that we must improve at in capability. It helps your Maths and makes you a better cricketer, comrades. It would also mean you can avoid umpiring! If you avoid both umpiring and scoring then the polit bureau will be taking a close look at selection time.

Deanov and Vladimir Boringski opened for us. Agar and Denton bowling. Agar had three maidens in 7 overs and cost only 13 runs – so nice and tidy. It did mean that Deanov had to play tight and build up to his normal prowess. Vlad too was keeping it tidy but Denton had other ideas and on his 2nd over got Vlad LBW for 0. This brought Robski in.

Denton again took our comrade Robski and this time a wicket. At this point we were 7 for 3. Oh dear. Familiarity breeds contempt and this situation is utterly contemptuous. What we needed was steady dotting and Captain Cobramovich stepped up and in. There was peace and calming vibes. no more wickets now for forty five minutes and the score could slowly rise. Deanov beginning to scent blood and bone. A blade flashing for collective might. Cobramovich steeling his nerve.

Denton and Agar had their spells and swapped out with Kimber and and Griffiths. Then Kimber jnr. and Collings. Now Deanov was off on a batting mission and we were up to 58. Captain Cobramovich was stumped off Griffiths slinking snake like back to the crease for 5. His return to the steps brought a sunken expression of “I know not to do that” but we were not down hearted. Brandonovski would keep Deanov company, and did so with similar style and grace as our captain. Dotting away like a pro.

Young Sam Kimber took his first grown up wicket (that is to say, a wicket of a grown-up not a fully developed set of stumps) off Deanov just after his 50. Brining in Samovar. Now both Kimber’s were bowling but it was young Kimber again who snaffled Brandonovski by enabling a catch in the field after he had dotted 27 balls, so well done. Poor Andropov very rapidly fell to young Kimber too, caught and bowled.

Disarray in the ranks! Samovar out for 13 to Sam’s father, Antonov in and out in five minutes being bowled Collings. Jontin was now keeping Chipmonksi company and he made a fine communist, if somewhat aristocratically compromised dot of it. Chipmonkski was bowled Denton and so in I popped as tail end Charlie. I padded one ball and then let Jontin face. But we we weren’t there for too much longer as Denton bowled Jontin next over. We were all out for 95. Another SCC batting experience with high points and many, many low points.

High points with the bat are Deanov’s 50 then some stoical “staying in” and slowing the rot by captain Cobramovich and Jontin. But joining these usual suspects were two splendid additions to the “I can stay in the crease” gang, Brandonovski and Chipmonkski. Well done comrades, sometimes for these timed games, staying in is worth a hell of a lot.

A very great day in the delightful Stonor Park and great weather too. Great thanks to all at Stonor for their hospitality and art work in the changing rooms(!).  Well done to young Sam Kimber for playing so well and to our splendid support from young Owen Sewelski stepping in early on to cover some late players. Boooh to the traffic in Henley!

…But a big thanks to all of us comrades for making this final match and the whole season so enjoyable and mutually splendid. A finer bunch of cricketing, communistic styled, soho based, media professionals and dependants you will not meet. Unless you do of course. In which case… ATTACK!

Your very devoted comrade commissar Premier, Yuri.

 

As ever, the scorecards are below!

Stonor CC innings

SCC innings